Another Country Music Awards Show

Fox Television Network is getting into the act, tonight with their first, ever, "American Country Awards" show. The awards are supposedly determined by the viewers. OK...I think "Peoples' Choice" came up with that concept, already...

Here's a list of song titles that probably never existed...but should have...and possibly will, in the future:

Men's Top Ten Country Songs:

10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine

9. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman, But I Woke Up With A Few

8. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me

7. I've Missed You, But My Aim's Improvin'

6. Wouldn't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Scared She'd Win

5. I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're Still Here

4. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Miss Him

3. She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger.

2. She's Lookin' Better with Every Beer

And the Number One Country Song &
Western song is...

1. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My Ass All Day

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